Read Angie's Thoughts

 I debated for a long time whether or not to write my annual list of 100 things I'm thankful for this year. A big part of me wants to just skip the tradition and take it back up next year. But I've realized that amidst the grief and sadness and unknowns, I really do have so much to be thankful for. The events on the afternoon of August 10 came completely out of nowhere and turned my entire world upside down. In those first hours of chaos and shock, I grabbed a notebook and started to make a list of the ways God had already shown up. I didn't want to forget them as the next days/weeks/months got crazy. Some of them will make their way into my list ☺ 1) Jesus - Over the years, as I've walked this life of faith, I've wondered how people without God can have hope in this sin sick world. Since starting this journey of grief, I wonder even more how people can grieve without the hope that only comes from faith in God. He is my Hope and my Sustainer, my ultimate source of j...

I've had the idea of this blog ruminating in my head for quite some time now, but have been hesitant to actually write it and put it out there. Why, I'm not exactly sure. I've realized in some of my friendships, my thoughts and feelings are often invalidated, and maybe I fear that if I share, I'll be met with a bunch of, "Well..." or "But..." responses. So keeping quiet is easier. Plus, broaching the subject I'm going to attempt to explain in a way that makes sense, is super scary. But, as one who strives to be real and authentic, I just need to put all my thoughts out there. Awhile back, while looking through a mental health account I follow on Instagram, I stopped on a story that talked about Passive Suicide. I had never heard of it before but it didn't take me long to realize I've actually been dealing with this for the past several years. What is Passive Suicide? "Passive suicidal ideation is described as thoughts focused on dyin...

My pastor preached a set of messages on suffering the past few weeks and they were pretty good (and I'm not just saying that out of thankfulness that his 2 part series didn't turn into a month or more...iykyk!) One of my favorite parts about his preaching is that he backs everything up with Scripture and he preaches the tough things with incredible love and grace. This last Sunday I was sitting next to a friend who has experienced incredible suffering in her life and at one point, I saw her lean into her husband as they continued to listen to the sermon. I'd be lying if I said that didn't make my heart ache a little. Actually, a lot.  I've always had moments of longing for a husband to help me shoulder the load of life but never more so than when I'm struggling with hard things from my past, I know, I know...not all marriages include a husband that is listening, supportive, and encouraging when their wives are going through something, but a lot of the marriages ...